How to be close to a shy person

Maybe you just want to be friends

There are many shy people out there and its not because they do it on purpose but in most cases, it could be because thats just how they are. There are some people out there who are just reserved and even when you try to befriend them it is just so difficult to do. Sometimes you can't really tell whether they are really happy, sad, irritated or overwhelmed. It is just so confusing sometimes right? Well we all know that at one time or another we might get attached to a shy person but for some reason, it is very difficult to tap into them. What exactly can you do?

Tips to becoming friends with a shy person

1. Ask friendly questions; People who are shy don't really want to have contact with people. Asking them questions may not exactly be their everyday cup of tea. However, asking really friendly and easy questions could begin a start of a productive conversation. What might these questions be? You can ask simple questions like How are you? How is life? Whats going on? simple stuff like that.

2. Share something about yourself; If somehow you are able to tell that the shy person is actually enjoying your company, you can share something about yourself to them. You don't have to keep it so long, just be brief and call back later at another more appropriate time.

3. Invite them for a drink; Usually shy people may not exactly like the idea of going out in a group of other friends. Ofcourse, you could still give it a try and invite them out. Sometimes the first time may not work but perhaps the second and third time may have some positive results.

4. Show genuine interest; Shy people sometimes are not good with words but you can still get them to open up. You can spend some time with them and take the initiative to get to know them better. Showing genuine interest should be because you want to and not because you should. No strings attached!

5. Be very attentive; If somebody shy gradually begins to talk to you, listen attentively to whatever they have to say.  Just because they may not talk much doesn't mean there is nothing up there. When you listen attentively and even show this with your facial expressions, that can really improve your bond.

Shy people aren't really hard to talk to, they are just shy. All the best!!

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Common relationships mistakes that couples make

You could be one of them

Everybody makes mistakes and that is just a fact of life which nobody can avoid. Ofcourse, there are times when we wish we had done it better, but the truth is mistakes are mean't to build you so that next time you dont do the same thing again. Heres some good advice for you, there are 5 common relationship mistakes that many couples make, which could sometimes even lead to a break-up. Read on folks!

5 common relationship mistakes made by couples

1. High Expectations; In my opinion I could be a victim to this myself you know. There isn't exactly anything wrong with having high expectations but the truth is, most times we want to set them so extremly high that when we discover that our partner fails in one or two or even more of them, then that just destroys our hopes of continueing the relationship any further. Heres some good advice for you, we just have to have a balanced approach to life.

2. Making comparisons; You know, many couples these days like to make comparisons. Comparisons on what or whom? Well sometimes people in a relationship may feel tempted to compare the person they are dating with somebody else they admire. Or, they may even compare there present relationship to one they had in the past. While this isn't really bad in itself, the truth is you have to learn to accept what you have right now and try to appreciate the positive aspects you have derived from it.

3. Being overly critical; There are times when we might just be tempted to be critical of a person we are actually having a relationship with perhaps because of certain flaws they have. Well here's some good advice for you, being too critical of somebody may make you look like you are perfect. Nobody is perfect!!

4. Easily buying into negative rumors; Nagative rumors about a person you have a relationship with coule really have a long time damaging effect on any couple. However, much depends on how much trust both of you have been able to build over the period of being together. If a rumor comes up and it certainly is negative, how should you react? Sad to say, many will easily believe what others have to say without giving their partner a benefit of doubt. While its true that there is no smoke without fire, you have to admit that hearing their side of the story could be a good thing too.

5. Not really saying how you feel; Its always good to be honest about how you feel about the relationship and what is really on your mind. Ofcourse, your intention is not to offend anybody but bringing out concerns promptly may amount to something.

Learning from mistakes

We humans are always on the journey of learning new things and learning how to handle whatever aspect of life we may face. The good news is that as we learn we can also learn to change our way of thinking and make ourselves better persons. Here's some good advice for you, lets do the best we can. All the best!

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5 signs your partner is unhappy and you dont know it

Appearances can be deceiving

In any relationship there are situations or phases where somebody just isn't happy. Ofcourse when you go out or hang out the person you are in a relationship with may appear happy but deep inside they are eating up. Well here's some good advice for you, appearances can be deceiving. This can be a really big problem to anybody and if left unchecked can spell really serious trouble in future. Well heres the good news, you can actually detect this problem before its too late. Here are 5 signs that show that your partner actually isn't happy.

5 signs they aren't happy with the relationship

1. They are less of themselves; If you have been in the relationship with somebody for a while then you should know beyond reasonable doubt when your companion suddenly changes. For example, If they were talking alot then they gradually stop talking then there maybe something wrong. There is definitely good reason to become concerned.

2. When they tell you; They may tell you to your face that they aren't happy at all. Ofcourse, we may be tempted to say to ourselves "Oh he always says that" or "Oh she always says that" and before you know it, they ask for a breakup. You see, when somebody tells you, take it seriously and dont take it for granted.

3. They talk about their past relationships; If somebody keeps talking about their past relationship maybe not to you directly but through a friend or relative, then there is really a high chance that they aren't really happy about what they have at current. Anyway, that's just my opinion.

4. When you detect you are becoming distant; Ofcourse you may be together but somehow you just feel that you are apart. I mean think of it, would two people become distant if they were really happy? Ofcourse there may be different circumstance but Chances are, he/she isn't happy. Its your call.

5. When they would rather spend time with somebody else; This doesn't need any explaining!

What you should do

You have to try to correct the problem by getting to the route cause of it. Always remember that it is never easy to solve a problem that took months to build in a day. It is very important to get the truth out from  them and try to understand everything. Could it be that they are not happy about you? Or could it be that they are not happy about life in general and they feel that a relationship to them at the moment is just inappropriate? After you get the truth out then would there be need to act on it.

Whatever the case, making your partner happy could be a process but in some cases you may not really have to put in so much. Heres some good advice for you, don't give up.

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5 signs you are in a toxic friendship

Don't say you weren't warned

Making friends is really a reality we all have to go through in life. But, not any kind of friend is a good friend because the truth is, you need somebody who will really build in you good qualities. Heres some good advice for you, that is fact. But what really is a friendship that is toxic? What can you do to get out of it or correct the problem? Lets get into this further shall we.

A toxic friendship

When you hear the word toxic, what exactly jets into your mind? Well in my opinion toxic could mean poisonous, bad, hurtful, irritating and the list goes on. But you see sometimes it isn't always easy to tell whether your current friendship is actually leading into something even more bad. But whatever the case, hears some good advice for you,... there are exactly 5 characteristics of toxic relationships. Wanna know?

1. Selfish intentions; Believe it or not some people out there only want to become your friend simply because they can gain something selfish out of it. We are not talking about gaining time and companionship because those are obvious things everybody needs in a relationship. But for selfish reasons, usually after they get what they want they will simply toss you away.

2. Unforgiving; Friends will make small and somtimes big mistakes but at the end of the day, if there is no room to iron out those differences, most times that can really make the relationship toxic.

3. Jealousy; True friends shouldn't be jealous of each others achievements, talents, relationships and other things in life that possibly make them seem better. Actually, real friends will always be happy of their friends progress in life. Ofcourse because we are all human, sometimes that feeling of jealousy can grow in us like wild fire. However, if this jealousy is left unchecked it could lead to really serious consequences. As in Really!

4. Competition; If two friends are always competing with each other to see who is actually better than the other,That can really be very toxic to friends.

5. Bad influence; If you are friends with somebody who influences or makes you do something bad which is clearly wrong then that friendship could be toxic. You see, true and good friends should build you up positively and not pull you down. Heres some good advice for you, true friends wouldn't want you making the wrong decisions in life.

Getting out of it

Getting out of a toxic friendship or continuing to be in one is purely a personal decision. But you really have to weigh matters carefully and see whether this is taking you anywhere or not. Ofcourse, if there is a problem you see, you wont automatically run away. Lets say the problem is that your friend doesn't seem to have a good influence on you, then what do you do? Well for starters, there is nothing wrong with ironing out the matter together. However, in my opinion if after repeated counsel your dear friend doesn't change then there might be need to make a decision. Hers some good advice for you, its your call. See ya!

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when should you give up the chase?

Warning signs you shouldn't ignore

Alright, you like somebody and you definitely want to begin dating. However, we all know that you can either be successful or can be unsuccessful. One thing for sure, there are always signs before hand that tell you whether you will be successful or not. These are warning signs you should never ever ignore. Here's some good advice for you,  you can save yourself the embarrassment if only you considered the signs.

Warning signs you wont be successful

1. Reply to messages; When there is somebody you like, it definitely hurts if they cannot respond to your messages. However, that shouldn't surprise you if there answer is NO. The thing is, some people have different ways of rejecting any more advances, some of which includes not responding to messages.

2. No saying Hi anymore; lets say you used to say hi but after you opened up about how you feel, they stop saying hi to you. While it may not always  be true that they have rejected to you, you have to consider the possibilities. The thing is, by not saying hi to you or suddenly ignoring you they are trying to push you away.

3. They tell you; If somebody tells you they are not interested it doesn't always mean that they are not actually interested, but sometimes it does. The point is for you to know whether they are serious or not.

Handling a rejection

Handling a rejection is not always easy especially if you were sure that things may work. But that isn't the end of the world because the next time you will certainly be successful. All the best.

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Tips to a good conversation on your first date

Making a conversation last

When you have found somebody you really like and think you see yourself spending the rest of your life with that person in the near future, you may definitely feel the need to begin dating. Now when you finally agree to go out on your first date, it can be really hard to know what exactly you are going to talk about. Well here's some good advice for you, you have to have something to say on your first date and it should be really something good. Lets get into this topic a bit further shall we.

Making your date really interesting

On your first date there is need to really enjoy a good conversation by bringing out good topics which would interest the both of you. It really isn't so difficult to do if you come to think of it because the point is, you want to get to know each other and that's the whole point of dating. Here are some tips to making the date interesting by having a good conversation.

1. Ask interesting questions; Asking good questions about the person actually demonstrates how interested you are to know them. Dont ask complicated deep questions but ask simple light questions such as how was your day? where is your family? what you love? All those simple questions can actually begin a conversation that would eventually become very interesting. Word of caution, don't interrogate your date at all.

2. Move at the right pace; When conversing on the first date there is no need at all to move too fast or too slow just move at the right pace. You don't need to go too deep into a persons background or past, just keep it comfortable and at the right pace. Here's some good advice for you, there is plenty of time and plenty of days ahead to get to know each other.

3. Share something about yourself; Ofcourse it is always good to share something about yourself but dont overwhelm the discussion to the other about yourself entirely. It shouldn't be about you only but should be about the two of you.

4. Tell them how you feel about them; Openly express yourself if you have to, how you feel about them and perhaps how you got to be interested in them. It is good to be sincere and explain what qualities you particularly liked that drew you to them.

5. Be humorous;  Not always easy but is important. Have a few laughs because thats what will make the date really interesting.

Good advice to handle the outcome of your first date

If your first date was very successful then there is reason to be very happy indeed. Ofcourse sometimes it doesn't always turn out like that but that shouldn't tear you down because what is important is that there is always a next time. As you continue getting to know each other, genuine couples will not focus much on the light flaws but on the strengths. Whatever the case, all the best!

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Are you really ready to quit your job

Weighing your options

Working for an organization or company can be really hard at times. Ofcourse there are times you just can't take it anymore because the current job you have just doesn't give you exactly what you are looking for. What do most people think in such a situation? well most times they think that the only option is to quit. Well whether its a bad or good thing, you really have to weigh your options carefully. Heres some good advice for you, lets look at this more deeply shall we.

When deciding whether to quit

Most times we run into deciding to quit too quickly without really understanding what we will be missing or gaining. You see, the whole issue of work is so that you can get food on the table. But, if there is a good reason to quit, well it definitely is a good reason to do so in your case. Well people quit for a variety of reasons. Others do so because of frustrations, others because of independence and others because they have found something better. But then how should we weigh our options carefully on any of these? Heres some good advice for you, Just read on!!

1. Quitting because of frustrations; Frustrations at the work place can be really frustrating at times. Perhaps the salary is bad, or perhaps your boss is bad and you really want to leave. Ofcourse, leaving is a good option especially if you are frustrated, but key questions you can do well to ask yourself is

-Are you really ready to leave?
-Are the frustrations really so bad that you should really leave?
-Are these frustrations able to be solved somehow?

Depending on your personal circumstances, some of these questions may help you weigh matters properly.

2. The need for independence; Many want to be their own boss some day and that in my opinion is a good thing because you have an opportunity to control your time, your finances and other benefits as well. But a key question you can do well to ask yourself is whether you are actually prepared? Being prepared means you should know exactly what you are doing, how you are going to actually begin your business and whether you have the right game plan in place. What we are saying, before you leave you should have already done your home work.

3. Finding something better; Some people decide to quit because they have found something better. Ofcourse getting a better job somewhere is really a wonderful experience. But sometimes its not always the high paying jobs that are always the best. That is really something you should do well to investigate before accepting the offer.

Quitting the job whatever the reason is really your personal decision, but weigh your decision carefully and see the benefits always. Here's some good advice for you, lets not hold any regrets.

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Getting someone you love to open up

Trying to melt the ice

Whether you are in a relationship or not, there are people out there whom you genuinly love and really want whats best for them. It could be your Marriage mate, a person you are courting or even a close friend, sometimes you want them to open up to you on any problem they are facing. Just how do you do it especially if they are usually closed up or want to face some of their problems on their own. Heres some good advice for you, there are 5 tips you can employ in any of these situations.

5 tips to get somebody to open up to you

1. Urge them to open up; when you are observant enough to see that your loved one is hiding something, or there is something really weighing heavily on their mind..Urge them to tell you what it is. You just need to ask them to open up in a comfortable, friendly and loving way so that they can actually do it.

2. Offer some reassurance; Try to reassure them that whatever it is they will tell you will be confidential, or you wont judge them or you will try to help where you can. Ofcourse whatever it is that they may reveal may affect you positively or negatively but the point is, you want to reassure to them that you genuinely care for them and really want to help.

3. Ask them what you think it is; Sometimes they may be hesitant to begin explaining what it is that is weighing them down. You may have an idea what is bothering them so without wasting anytime, pour your idea out. If you think its because you offended them, ask them whether its because of you. If you think its because they went through something at work, ask them whether it was something they experienced at work. Just get them to speak by beginning the process yourself.

4. Be patient; They may be really hesitant to reveal what it is on their mind but dont be too impatient with them, actually that is the best time to show your patience. By being patient and allowing them to express themselves at their own pace, that will put them on a comfortable position to reveal whatever it is on their minds.

5. Let time pass; if they are not ready to reveal to you what is bothering them or weighing them down, let some bit of time pass. Although this is not always the most recommended, it could help them reflect on the importance of sharing their problem especially with you.

Good advice in handling the information they tell you

Sometimes they may tell you information which can directly affect you or you two. However, the way you handle the information will much depend on the gravity. Ofcourse, every situation is unique and one thing we shouldn't forget is that problems should somehow be solved. Heres some good advice for you, lets by all means try to solve the problem. All the best!!

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Chasing after the wind

Time to rethink your strategy

Alright, you have been trying so hard to achieve something you hold dear but nothing seems to work at all. What could be the problem? here's some good advice for you, you might just be chasing after the wind. You know what it is in life right? Sometimes things come easy while at other times things don't come easy, but the point is, you have to know when you might be chasing after the wind. Here's some good advice for you, you might just have to rethink your strategy. Here are 3 common reasons why people keep chasing after the wind and never get what they want.

3 reasons why some people never get what they want

1. No effort; Some people know they really want something but they never really apply any effort at all. Ofcourse, alot of times people will say they do but lets face it...if you are just at home and seating on the couch watching T.V, you will never get anything right. You have to make sure you show some effort and do something. Heres some good advice for you, you can do it.

2. No strategy; People, what is a strategy? Well a strategy tells you where you want to go and how you are going to get there. For instance, lets say you want a job, the next question is how are you actually going to get the job. Some people just end at wanting the job and never really answering how they are going to get the job. You see, you have to know what it is you actually have thats going to make you successfully arrive at your destination. What are your strengths and weaknesses? Who can help you get a job? Who can help you get information as to where a job is? By especially answering the how question, then can you be getting yourself somewhere.

3. No consistency; When you want to have something you definitely have to be consistent about achieving it. There is no two ways about it, you have to make it a point not to give up or burn out. Here is some good advice for you, if you started something keep on working towards it. If you fail, dont burn out but keep on making sure you achieve what you want to achieve.

Knowing what is worth fighting for and what is not

Ofcourse what you choose to achieve is your decision but the point is it should be worth the effort. Something that is key is that it shouldn't interfere with your family, it shouldn't spoil your relationship and it shouldn't make you feel bad. Here is some good advice for you, make it count.

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Are you in a real relationship?

You may think you are but aren't

Relationships are such a sweet thing in life more especially if everything is going on just fine. However, if you didn't know, sometimes people think they are in a real relationship.....but when reality comes knocking on their door they just find out there wasn't really anything seriously happening. But then, what do we mean when we say a real relationship? Are most relationships real or not? Here's some good advice for you, real relationships are special.

Real relationships

Relationships these days are all about getting to know each other. Ofcourse there are other activities that include going out and texting but the whole point is for the two of you to get to know each other well. In real relationships the ultimate goal is to see whether the two of you can spend the rest of your lives together in happiness. So what does this all mean? Well real relationships involve seriousness and two people have to both realize where they want to ultimately go.

Most times, people take dating for mere fun and you find that because of that, relationships dont quit last as long as what most people would like to see. I mean think of it, if a relationship only lasts for three months would you call that a real relationship? Not at all folks. But you see, whatever the case it seems to be okay for countless people out there because they get to break up and make up and eventually find somebody they so desire. But then, what are the characteristics of real relationships? Are you in a real relationship or are you just being taken for a ride?

5 characteristics of real relationships

1. Genuine interest; People who are getting to know each other are doing it not out of selfish reasons or because there are strings attached. But they are doing it because of that genuine desire to get to know each other. There are times you just want to know a person because of that genuine interest and nobody forces you to show that interest but you just have it in you.

2. Loyalty; In real relationship, people are loyal to each other. They know that it is absolutely inappropriate to toy with another persons feelings. They know that in a real relationship you have to commit only to one person.

3. Love; Love and not infatuation should be a driving quality that should bind two people together for a long time. In real relationships, love truly endures in my opinion. Ofcours you might have your own views but to me, in my opinion this is truly a good quality.

4. Time frame; Most people in real relationships will be together for a long time something that is different from relatonships that just takes a few months. Heres some good advice for you, if you are in a relationship always aim to be together for as long as possible.

5. Marriage the goal; In my opinion, Marriage should really be on the back of the heads of both people atleast at some point while they are dating.

Whatever the case most real relationships should bring something meaningful at the end of the day and really contribute to a whole lot of joy and happiness. All the best!!

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5 things that chase away guys

When it comes to the dating world, everybody knows that dating is all about getting to know each other with a possibility of somebody tieing the knot. In a relationship, some ladies find it very hard to keep the relationship going, WHY? Well here's some good advice for you, it could be because of certain qualities or habits. In my opinion, this isn't meant to offend anyone but lets just see how you can aviod this trap shall we.

Why some ladies are not even given a chance

1. Nagging; Guys don't like ladies who are constantly nagging, or even nagging at all. What is nagging? well nagging involves persistant, annoying and irritating way of finding faults in another person. That can just be a starter for an argument.

2. Too Demanding; Ladies who are too demanding can really drain the energy out of most people they are dating. But demanding on what? Time, money and other things can really drive somebody crazy. The thing is, there are enough problems taking place in this world but adding more is really a heavy load for most guys. Heres some good advice for you, dont be too demanding.

3. Seeing other guys; We are not talking about seeing other guys but dating other guys. You see, some ladies just don't seem to realize that there could be only one person in their lives and not three or four. Some guys are really sensitve to such things and the minute they find out, they just wont allow for a possibility of having a relationship or even letting a relationship continue.

4. Lying; There are some ladies in this world believe it or not who lie like it was some kind of hobby or something. Well everybody lies at some point but with these ones its almost as if they love to lie. Well heres some good advice for you, that can just chase a guy away.

5. Too Jealous; Some ladies are just so jealous of their guys they are dating. When they see their date talking to other ladies, their temper gets off the charts. You see, just because two people are dating doesnt mean they can't talk to others. However, when it comes to these ladies, they see just the opposite. The thing is, sometimes it could be due to past experience but whatever the reason is,  that can just errupt some serious trouble.

Hope this helped and all the best!!

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How to save your relationship

There are some relationships if not many that are on the verge of collapsing. Ofcourse that can happen alot these days for a countless number of reasons and although sometimes we really want to be together, it just turns out that the relationships is really on the rocks. Imagine you are in such a situation, how do you even begin to save the relationship? Heres some good advice for you, nobody said it would be easy.

Saving your relationship from disaster

Many times we will tell ourselves that we still love the person we are dating and we dont want the relationship to end. If somebody tells you that they want to have a short break out of the relationship making it seem like its just because you two need some space, then know for sure that your relationships is heading for disaster. In my opinion, that really isnt the solution.

So how do you exactly save your relationship from a break up disaster? well first of all you really have to identify why your relationship has arrived at this state in the first place. Alot of times couples just keep on banking the mistakes and offences that were committed by their love without really sorting the problem out. In a nut shell, it doesn't really help to keep things in but it helps alot, if problems or misunderstandings are let out and solved. Saving your relationship will certainly require time and energy. Here are a few tips to saving your relationship from a total break-up, heres some good advice for you...Nobody said it would be easy.

1. Forgiveness; Easier said than done but that is the first way a relationship can be saved. If two people are ready to forgive each other and put things behind them then things can work.

2. Committment; Even after apologies are made and sorry s said, you might just find that things aren't the same as they were before. Ofcourse that is a reality that we have to embrace especially if you were the one who caused the relationship to be at the state that it is. However, you have to be committed to saving the relationship. You have to take time and effort to save it. What are some things you should do to show that you are actually committed? Well for starters, your actions will speak for itself. Take for example, if you are a person who hasn't made certain personal changes in your life  to make the relationship work, then it just shows you aren't really committed to that cause. Here's some good advice for you, commitment will always show in somebody.

3. Get some help; There is nothing wrong in getting an extra hand in saving your relationship from somebody close to you. Take for instance, your love doesn't want to get back together with you at all costs. If you just so happen to be good friends with his/her friend, why not ask them to talk to the person you are dating that you still want the relationship to work. Alternatively you can get the assistance of somebody whom you know will certainly be successful in talking to your date about the possibilities of saving the relationship.

4. Patience; Do not think that saving your relationship will always take a day, or a week or even a month...Sometimes it takes longer than that but the point is you dont want to look so desperate that it even becomes irritating. Be patient and try to take things as cautious as possible. Remember, when you want to save a relationship, sometimes the other person wont easily give you a quick response as to whether you two can continue but he/she will certainly be thinking about it. During that long phase of them thinking, dont be too pushy but give them space to think.

Heres some good advice for you, nobody said it would be easy but taking these steps may take you somewhere. All the best!!

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Starting your day on a bright note

Have you ever been a situation where you just wake up feeling more tired and exhausted than when you begun your sleep? Well that can happen to many people because the world we live in is just totally, totally busy. But look at the bright side, you can get rid of that exhausted feeling and that tired body of yours by just taking the necessary steps you need to take. I personally am not a medical practitioner but through my own personal experience these are some of the steps you can take. Heres some good advice for you, READ ON!!

Steps to beginning your day on a bright note

1. Have a good nights sleep; Ofcourse this is obvious but let me just mention that most of the times because of our busy schedules we tend to get so exhausted but at the same time we keep forcing our bodies to do the work we need to do. Heres some good advice for you, every person needs atleast 8 hours of sleep because that is the ideal situation.

2. Drink alot of water; Water is one of those special substances in life that has a purifying effect on your body. In my opinion, I think its the best liquid to start your day or end it because when you drink it you definitely feel refreshed. There is need to drink atleast a 5 cups of water everyday and there is no negotiation about that, you just have to force yourself to drink.

3. Do exercise; If you can exercise everyday that could be really commendable. However, why is exercise so important anyway, well by exercising you are allowing blood circulation to be quickened as a result making your bodies healthy. Have you ever noticed how different you feel after a good days exercise? Well that even gives you an opportunity to have a good nights sleep and consequently start your say on a bright note.

4. Wake up early; Try by all means to begin your day on an early note, and if you so happen to be near the coast or sea, breath the early morning breeze and feel the cool air blanket your entire body. In my opinion, that could be fantastic to starting your day on a good note.

5. Eat the right food; You know alot of times we want to run to junk food, carbonated drinks, beers e.t.c However, did you know that if you eat right you can actually enjoy a good nights sleep and thus wake up on a brighter note. Try to have a meal that has fruits and vegetables. If you need additional advice on this, ask specialist in dieting, you will be amazed at what foods you will find beneficial to you.

Heres some good advice for you, following these tips may not give you a perfect solution but will certainly give you the health you need to begin your day on bright note. All the best!!!

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Handling an accusation

Something very painful

It can be very painful if the person you are dating is accusing you of something very serious which can really have an effect on the future between the two of you. Have you ever been accused of cheating? Well, the truth is those are some of the most common accusations people face today. But then, why are people accused these days especially of cheating? Well here's some good for you, read on.

Reasons why people get accused of cheating

1. Trust; Someone who accuses you of cheating could be that he/she doesn't fully trust you like they should. Ofcourse there may be reasons to that but whatever is the reason, you have to sort it out fast before it ruins your relationship all together.

2. Possessiveness; When the person you are dating is very possessive, they will tend to be jealous at almost anything. If they see you with somebody of the opposite sex just chatting then there is reason for serious suspicion. Such kinds of relationships can really drain your energy and that's that.

3. Past experience; If you cheated before in the past then probably in their minds they haven't fully built their trust in you. So, if they hear something even if it is clearly a lie, then to them you are cheating and it becomes really hard to convince them that you are innocent.

4. Negative reports; When they receive rumors about you or negative reports then usually they will tend to think you are cheating on them. Ofcourse, the truth is you are not but they don't believe that at all.

How to handle an accusation

Handling an accusation is never easy and you know why? because its a problem with the person whose accusing you. As long as they have it in their mind that you are a cheat for whatever reason, it usually becomes problematic to handle that situation. So, to handle such a situation you need to realize that you are innocent and you have nothing to hide.

One of best ways to get your word out to the accuser is to be sincere and to freely provide the facts as they are. If they are witnesses you can bring in the witnesses. However, there just reaches a point where the only person who can actually resolve the situation is the accuser. Remember, the image in his/her mind is negative and as long as he/she chooses to leave it there then does it become so difficult to save the relationship. Ofcourse, we shouldn't think that all hope is lost because by giving them reassurance and trying to convince them then can we have a better chance at handling the situation successfully. Here's some good advice for you, don't give up.

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Acknowledging your limitations

Reality speaks for itself

As individuals we are good at certain things while at the same time we may be really terrible at other things. The thing is, nobody can be the best at everything because that can just make you invincible. However, when determining what you want to achieve or what kind of projects you would like to embark on you have to realize that you have certain limitations. Heres some good advice for you, you have to always take a realistic approach to life.

Taking a realistic approach to life

When embarking on a journey, it is always good to establish what you have and what you don't have. Lets just say you would like to build a house, you certainly know too well that there is always need to have the right materials, the right funds, the right manpower and the list goes on. You see, it is alright to have dreams that are meaningful and that are worth it in life. People spend alot of time dreaming of what they want to become and where they want to go, but most of the times they dont achieve those goals because they haven't established what kind of right materials they need to make it work. Lets look at some common goals where people fail and are not realistic;

1. Being promoted at work; Many promotions come with experience, hard work and the right qualifications. However, most times people want to have a really quick promotion within the shortest most possible time frame. Do you honestly think a promotion will come when you have just joined an organization? Those are rare cases. In the real world, it certainly takes a lot of time, hardwork and committment to build up to a standard where people will finally grant you a big promotion with a good salary.

2. Being financially independent; We are not talking about being rich but here we are talking about being able to stand on your own and being able to call the shots. Most people want to have control of their time, their finances and even other aspects of life. However, the thing is that in the realistic sense, getting to that level in life requires effort and a long term strategy. Ofcourse their have been few examples out there who have experienced a turn around overnight but realistically speaking there is a alot of work you need to do. What are the common limitations people face in this area? Resources, time and energy. Here's some good advice for you, acknowledging these things may enable a person to rethink their strategy.

3. Thinking we are always right; One of the biggest things we all face is that we all have the tendency to think we are always right and that we know everything. It is very important to realize that one of the strongest limitations we should especially learn to acknowledge is that we don't know everything. The fact is at one time or another we need to learn to accept the right kind of counsel, learn to consult others where we are not clear, learn to accept help even though we think we don't need it and finally learn to be humble. Doing so will show that we surely acknowledge our own limitation and that in order to move ahead we should be willing to take the right kind of advice.

Here's some good advice for you, by acknowledging your own limitations will you be taking a realistic approach to life.

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How to choose between two people

There are times in our lives when we have that all important choice we have to make. Imagine there are two different people you know very well. You really want to date one of them but you are not sure which one to choose because they are so evenly matched. Such a scenario can even become more complicated if you have to choose between your Ex or another person. Pretty tight right? here's some good advice for you, you can only choose one. But in the first place, how does such a thing happen? and how can you make the right choice?

How does someone get into such a situation?

If its a lady, thats so easy to explain because most of the time ladies will recieve different proposals from so many guys and then have to come up with a decision. But it can become quite complicated if the lady likes not just one guy but two guys and then has trouble chooseing which one to commit to. Like earlier mentioned it can get very complicated if one of those guys is an Ex.

Sometimes, when we break-up with somebody we tend to meet other people we think we can Marry one day. But just before the relationship becomes official, then pops up the Ex who wants to get back together which can really, really complicate things in choosing who you want to be with. But whether its guys or ladies who face this situation the principle is the same, an important decision has to be made which will hurt one person and make the other happy. Really big decision indeed, but how do you make a decision? and make the right one. Heres some good advice for you, read on.

Making the right decision

Choosing between two people is never an easy task because deep inside you know you like both of them and both of them are willing to be with you. Well in making the right decision, here are 5 tips you can employ to ensure you are on the right track.

1. How do you feel; In principle, which one do you like more? Ofcourse we both know that it is not an easy question to answer but whether you like it or not, there has to be an answer. You see if you keep on saying I like both of them, then you wont be able to come up with an answer and that can only mean a dead end.

2. Who is best for you; Between the two, who will bring out the best in you. When we say bringing out the best in you we mean who between the two will make you happier, will bring out good qualities in you and will look out for you. Take for example, you wont choose a person who encourages you to engage in something that is clearly wrong.

3. What do others think; People always have something to say, especially something bad. But to avoid falling into this trap, why not ask a a trusted friend or experienced adult about who they think is the best person for you. Ofcourse, you get to make the final choice in all aspects.

4. Who between the two do you see a spouse?; Believe it or not, dating is all about getting to know each other so that one day you can settle down together and get Married. So between the two, whom between the two is more likely to make a good spouse should you want to get Married? Remember, you have to look for Marriage material folks.

5. Which one is more mature; Might sound harsh but the truth is, dating is for mature people. Ofcourse not everyone is at the same level but having somebody who is mature will ensure that your relationship is secure and atleast you can be happier.

You have to realize that the final decision rests in you and nobody will force you what to do because you are the holder of which route you want to go through in life. Heres some good advice for you, make the right choice today.

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Trying to love again

Moving on after a heart-break

Many people have gone through horrible heart breaks in their lives and whats worse, when its the first time it can really create deep wounds. Many times, we tend to think we will never heal from the pain and agony we have to carry each day. While this may be the case, the truth is that everybody at one time or another will heal even if it has to take a few months, years or decades. However, there is absolutely no need to keep on hurting for the rest of your life, heres some good advice for you....you have to move on. However, why is trying to love again a good idea and when should you actually give love a second chance? Heres some good advice for you, you can love again.

Why so important

Everybody has a choice in life whether to get Married or choose to remain single. However, whichever one you choose they should both bring you some measure of happiness. Some people choose to remain single because of a horrible experience they went through in life. But whichever way a person chooses to lead his life, if there is an opportunity to be happy, why not be happy? Ofcourse there is no guarantee you will be happy whether you are single or not but the point is, if that special person walked into your life all of a sudden would you shun them away?

Moving on after a heartbreak whether single or not is important, why? Well because you don't want to keep on holding onto the past and carrying that heavy load of sadness each and everyday. You want to free yourself of the past experiences you went through and then give life a second chance, Heres some good advice for you, you can do it. But how do you determine whether you are ready to move onto another relationship?

Signs you are ready for another relationship

1. Peace of mind; If your mind is at peace, you will soon realize that it becomes easier to interact with others and also start dating. Having peace of mind means that you are not resentful, not angry or not bitter at whatever happened in the past. In short, you have taken the step to throw that heavy burden of sadness into the ocean and move on to the next level. When you do that, then you are ready for the next phase.

2. You have control of your emotions; Sometimes because of a sad experience in life such as a breakup, we tend not to have full control of our negative emotions. This happens all the time you know. However, we shouldn't let it happen all the time because if it does, then our future relationships may be threatened. Taking control of your emotions will ensure that you are not easily offended, suspicious or angered by actions of others.

3. Not negative about your next relationship; Sometimes when we go through a heartbreak, we always think that it will happen again. That can be a very big hinderance in letting us enjoy the next relationship if we ever got a chance. Heres some good advice for you, you have to be positive that nothing will go wrong even if your past experience was so bad and probably harsh.

When trying to love again it requires some bit of effort, but the truth is many have actually managed to love again while sadly, others are still working on it. Well here's some good advice for you, take your time and don't rush. All the best.

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Questions you should always ask when dating

It doesn't hurt to find out

Dating is such a wonderful experience especially if its with somebody you love, trust and hopefully want to Marry. There is no doubt that dating can provide you an opportunity to prepare for Marriage one day. However, when really getting to know somebody there are questions you should never ever afford to miss. Here is some good advice for you, read on.

5 questions that really matter

1. What do you think about me?; Ofcourse, you may guess while you are together that a person obviously likes you or not but its even more exciting if you get to hear it from their own mouths....In a sincere way. Even so, the way they say it will be able to convince you whether you are somebody whose important in their lives or not.

2. What are your goals?; It is really important to get to know which direction in life they really want to head in life. This is important because you want to know where you fit in and whether you will be happy or comfortable with such a course. Them revealing to you their goals will help you know whether thats what you really want too.

3. What about your past relationships; Getting to know about their past relationships isn't such a bad idea and if they are sincere, they will even tell you the whole truth. For example if they were once Married they will tell you that they have children and their former spouse has to have a small part in your lives. In short they shouldn't hide anything from you.

4. What do you think about Marriage; We are not saying you have to ask them to Marry you but you just have to tactfully know their views about Marriage. If they are not into Marriage then you know that they may never propose or want you to propose to them for a Marriage anytime soon. Ofcourse, that can put your relationship on slippery ice in some cases especially if you want to get Married soon.

5. Do I really want to be in the relationship; Its very important to be honest with yourself and always ask yourself whether you really want to be dating or not. You see, dating is a serious matter and should always be taken seriously. So if you know you really want the relationship then you will definitely be committed to making it work however if you are honest enough to know you don't want it, instead of wasting the time of you date its better you end it.

Good advice to getting to know somebody

Getting to know the person you are dating is important because you want to be sure and honest whether that's the kind of person you really want to spend the rest of your life with. So getting to know somebody will require knowing the likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses, goals, qualities and other personal traits. Basically, getting to know somebody does take some time and communication but here is some good advice for you, it is worth it. All the best!!

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5 common mistakes made during dating

You could fall victim

Marriage definitely has always been on your mind and without a doubt you want to find somebody who can complete you and whom you can be happy with. Lets face it, its important to start dating especially when you are ready to. However, during the dating stage it is highly critical that we get to understand the most common mistakes that people make these days while dating. Heres some good advice for you, you dont want to fall victim to any of them.

5 common mistakes made during dating

1. Hiding who you really are; The whole purpose of dating is to get to know each other and get to really see both your strengths and weaknesses. Now, if you just keep hiding who you really are one way or another the truth will come out. It isn't recommended at all for that ugly truth to come out when you are both Married to each other because that can really get ugly.

2. Expecting perfection; Expecting perfection from the person you are dating could be another common mistake made by people who are dating. There are always going to be minor things which you two both don't agree with, however if they can be solved why should you rush into breaking up. Heres some good advice for you, dont expect perfection from anybody including from yourself.

3. Not letting others know; There are benefits in letting especially your close family and friends know about the person you are dating because they have your best interest at heart.Ofcourse thats a decision you want to make personally and nobody should force you whether to reveal it out to anybody or not. In my opinion, you gotta let others know.

4. Rushing things; Getting to know somebody shouldn't be done in a rush. However, these days people rush into a relationship and end up rushing out of it. Weird right? but it is absolutely true and that's how it is these days. We need to realize that sufficient time is needed and you have to realize on your own whether the step you are taking is really what you want.

5. Dating others; These days people are just playing with each others feelings like it is a normal thing. However the truth is, dating should just be between two people. Here's some good advice for you, don't be dating two people at the same time because you will just hurt them, hurt yourself and hurt others who later come to hear about it. Toying with somebody s feelings is just so cruel.

Ofcourse, every relationship has its own kinds of problems but here's some good advice for you, we can avoid these 5 mistakes if we tried. Try it NOW!!

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7 Reasons they never called you back

The common reasons

You may be trying very hard to find somebody you can probably start dating and probably get married one day but things always go wrong. Lets say you just had a very good conversation with somebody you like very much and after exchanging numbers you wait for a call back but nothing happens. Or lets just say you always call this one person you like very much and even have a very good conversation but they still never call you back. What exactly is the big reason? Heres some good advice for you folks, there are actually 7 common reasons why. Don't take this personal.

Why they never call back

1. They are busy; You wont believe it but many of the people who don't respond back to calls do it because they are just so preoccupied with so many activities. The busy schedules they have to pull through everyday at work, with friends and family makes it increasingly difficult to call back. Ofcourse they do think of it, but out of nowhere another important activity just pops up which they can't really get out of.

2. They are nervous; If somebody likes you they may find it very hard to call back and begin a conversation. Nervousness and anxiety can really hit hard on some people and the negative thoughts in their minds can make it difficult to call back.

3. They have nothing to talk about; You wont believe how difficult it is for some people to begin a conversation over a phone and maintain it without any problems at all. Because they have nothing to talk about they would rather avoid embarrassing themselves and just avoid the whole thing all together. Strange right? You have to believe it.

4. They are seeing someone else; If they are dating somebody else, they obviously dont want their date to think they are cheating on them. So most times, they would rather not call back on someone of the opposite sex....Atleast not immediately.

5. They are not interested; This ofcourse is the most undesirable reason anybody would want to hear. Getting to learn that somebody doesn't call you back because they are not interested could really put you off but thats the truth and you have to live with it. However, not being interested could come with different reasons.

6. They are undecided; A person who is hanging on two different points of view may hesitate to call back especially if its anything to do with love, relationships or anything else that is serious. Lets take for example, you tell somebody you like them and want to get to know them, then they tell you they will call you back but they dont actually do that. What could be the problem? Well they probably are still thinking about it.

7. The call didn't reach them; Sometimes when you call them, they receive the missed call but for some crazy unknown reason they never get to see your missed call. Nomatter how crazy it may seem, it could be true.

Don't run into conclusions

In my opinion, it isn't really wise to run into conclusions. You know if somebody doesn't call back we shouldn't immediately think they are just trying to avoid a conversation or avoid you because they dont like you. You can at least give a benefit of a doubt and try to talk about it. Doing that will at least clear all the doubts and probably make you feel a little bit better. Here's some good advice for you, don't always take things personal if things don't work out. All the best!!

 

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How to avoid being nervous

Anxiety can creep in anytime

Just what exactly is nervousness? Well, you know that weird strange feeling you get when something big is about to happen, or when there is somebody you like but just don't know how to approach them...Nervousness basically comes in when you feel anxious that things might just go wrong. You see nervousness usually happens when you are anticipating that things might go horribly wrong and that in my opinion is good and bad. However, in most cases that I have seen there is absolutely no need to be nervous about anything. Heres some good advice for you, don't overwhelm yourself with so much anxiety.

Overcoming nervousiness

Nervousness begins in the mind. You see, when you put a negative picture in your head that things may go wrong, thats when anxiety creeps in. There is nothing really wrong in being nervous because in my opinion that acts like a shield. Take for instance, if you know what you have decided to do is wrong, you get nervous and that can actually help you change your mind which is a good thing. However, sometimes we tend to get overwhelmed with our thoughts that at the end of the day we hold back in actually doing things we thought we should have done well. Having a balanced measure of nervousness could be good but how do you actually overcome it in these three common scenarios.

1. Job interview; You have just been called for an interview and you know very well that you are the best person for the job. But did you know that even the best qualified people get nervous that they end up looking like a bunch of amateurs? Don't make that mistake. You can overcome that anxiety by being prepared and self motivated. Overcoming nervousness in a Job interview requires you to feel at home and not intimidated by any question. Put it in your mind that you are going to get the job and you are going to be a success at the interview. Heres some good advice for you, dont be nervous at all.

2. When telling someone you like them; If you have found somenody you feel is the right person and you are ready to begin courting, there is no way they are going to know your intentions if you don't go and tell them. However, did you know that many people miss out on an opportunity simply because they are nervous. What comes into their minds is that it can never work, it just can never work. Unless you have a very good reason to believe those thoughts, you just have to give it a try. When overcoming this kind of nervousness you have to change your mindset and believe that a good result will come out of your efforts. Heres some good advice for you, do it.

3. When being accused; On rare occasions you may be accused of doing stuff which you clearly have never ever done before in your life. However, because it is very serious sometimes you may actually be called to prove your innocence in front of many onlookers. That can really create alot of anxiety because you might feel that things might go wrong. However, the truth is you are innocent and why should you be nervous at all. You have to prepare your mind and prepare what you are going to say in confidence. You need not feel intimidated but feel confident that whatever you have to say is the truth and you are 100% innocent. Heres some good advice for you, dont be nervous.

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How to tell someone you are sorry

Hurting your love is painful

If you are going through a situation in life where you made a terrible horrible mistake against the person you love so much, you are not alone. The truth is, mistakes always happen in life and there is little we can do to reverse what just happened. You have heard of the saying don't cry over spelt milk right? Lets just say you have been dating this one person you love so much to the pount you even want to Marry them one day. Imagine having committed a mistake which you are so ashamed of and you just dont know what to do to earn the forgiveness and trust you once shared together. Heres some good advice for you, you can get back together. However, the question is how?

Telling someone you are sorry from the heart

Its never easy getting back together with somebody you offended really badly. Ofcourse, it may not be your date but it could be anybody in this world. You see, if you broke up because of a mistake you did, it is still very much possible to get back together again.

Telling someone you are sorry should come from the heart and shouldn't be because you have to, but because you genuinely want to. When you offend somebody you have to realize that as normal human beings they are hurting very much and you shouldn't expect miracles to happen. Healing almost always takes some bit of time. However, that is not to say you still don't have a chance. In most cases when you hurt someone, they don't want to see you again or even talk to you.

You have to take it calmly and you have to be consistent. Don't give up but keep on trying to reach the offended persons heart by what you say and how you say it. If they dont want to see you, dont hold it against them but give them some time to heal. Healing takes time especially if the offense was serious. Now how do you actually tell someone you are sorry by word and action?

Tips to getting forgiven

1. Be apologetic; When somebody apologizes, it is not exactly what you say but how you say it. When you apologize you should mean what you say and it should defintely touch a persons heart in the way you say it.

2. Admit you made a mistake; Being defensive about what you did wont get you anywhere, but admitting you were wrong could get you forgiven very quickly. It is always important to reassure the offended person that you will never repeat it ever agiain.

3. Take measures to change; If there are clearly things about you that lead to the offense or qualities about you which you think you should change, then heres some good advice for you why not make those changes. Taking steps to change will not only be good for you but will also make your loved one see the seriousness of your desire to get back together again.

4. Buy a sweet gift; A gift can be very thoughtful way of trying to convince someone you still care about them and you want them back in your lives.

All the best folks in your endeavors because whether its a friend, or a Marriage mate or someone you are courting, you can still make things work. Here's some good advice for you, you can do it.

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Dealing with critism

Dont always take it personal

Have you ever been criticized? Well that can really touch negatively on anybody especially when you know you have done your best to do the right thing. However what exactly is criticism? Well according to one definition, criticism is an expression of disapproval by someone based on perceived faults or mistakes. Ofcourse, since it is only means that it is perceived it doesn't necessarily mean that you have done anything wrong. However, it still needs to be said that nobody is perfect and we are always bound to make mistakes. So how do we exactly deal with criticism? Well before we answer that, why do people even get criticized at all. Heres some good advice for you, READ ON!!

5 common criticisms made by people

1. They talk too much: You know people may criticism you because they feel that you talk too much. Many times you may hear this statement made against anybody and then you ask yourself whether its true. Whether its true or not, the fact is somebody is being criticized for exhibiting a percieved weakness in the eyes of others. OUCH!!

2, They only think of themselves; Sometimes people criticism others of being self centered and not really thinking about the welfare of others. Hearing something like that can be really discouraging especially if it isn't true, however that's why its called a criticism.

3. They are lazy; Some people think of others as being lazy and relaxed about life because they haven't really made it in life and probably because things just hasn't happened. Ofcourse that can really hurt especially if you feel it isn't true at all, but lets just say that is all what criticism is all about. It is negative.

4. They never do anything right; One of the most common critisms I have personally heard is that they never do anything right. That can be really damaging to anybody even if it is true. However, thats just how life is, it is full of criticisms.

5.  They are too irritating; Something I personally hear alot these days is people cristising others because they are percieved to bee too irritating. Well what can we say, whether its true or not it is all just criticism. Here's some good advice for you, you have to deal with it.

Dealing with criticism

Criticism is definitely something which usually isn't easy to deal with but lets face it, it is a reality we all face. Heres some good advice for you, if you are being criticized whether its true or not it certainly is something you can do well to reflect and learn. You know, most times we easily get offended of what others say about us and that can really be damaging especially if you know thats not how you are. But the funny thing is that many think they really arent how people think of them.

How do you exactly deal with a criticism? well first things first, don't easily get offended and try as much as possible to establish whether what other people think about the matter is the truth. Ask a close friend or a relative and get their views. If it isn't true then you have nothing to worry about, but if you establish that what others say about you is genuine, then there is urgent need to make drastic changes. You see criticism, can actually help you become a better person. When somebody says something negative about you, whether its true or not you can always find ways to improve.

The sky is the limit folks and nobody is perfect, the best way to handle any challenge in life is to bravely take it on. Heres some good advice for you, don't overreact but always find a way to use criticism to build yourself, your qualities and your personality. All the best!!

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Getting what you want

Preparing your mind for action

There may be meaningful things you have always wanted to achieve. Ofcourse meaningful things is defined differently by different people but heres some good advice for you, in my opinion there is only one meaningful thing that I know..Wanna Know???? Am not going to tell you. However, apart from that..you may have wanted to achieve something but soon realize that not one goal you wanted so bad has turned out to be a success. There is no need to remain in that state anymore because now is the time to remove all those doubts and prepare your mind for action. Here is some good advice for you, you can make it work...today!!

Making your goals a reality

1. What do you really want? You have to ask yourself what you really want and how you are going to get there. Did you know that sometimes we want things that are not very important? Things that will just steal our lives away from people who are close to us and possibly ruin our reputation. Those should be avoided. But ofcourse, thats just my opinion. What we are saying here is that you should clearly define what you want and make sure you understand what you want and what is involved in getting to that point at all.

2. Take action; Alot of times people know what they want but they never take action. Seating comfortable on you couch wont bring home results. For example, you may want employment and you know what kind of employment you really want. You have sent application letters to practically every place but still haven't received any response. Yes we know that finding a job is always tricky business but you have to go a step further. You have to take action by making a follow-up on your application or by tactfully going to meet the human resource manager for an inquiry.

3. Embrace failure; You know what? A good proportion of failure is good for you. The reason is it provides some learning points and helps you realize where you went wrong and where you should make the necessary improvements. You need to accept defeat but never give up.

4. Get some help; There are people on this Earth who are willing to offer help. You may be surprised that some of these people can offer this help for absolutely free and wont ask for anything in return. They don't always have to be people we know, but even strangers. But when dealing with strangers there is always need for caution because you dont know them. However, the point is, people around you can give you the necessary push you need to get ever closer to your goals.

Making sure they are meaningful

When setting goals in life a lot of times we aim big which is not necessarily bad but here is some good advice for you, there is always need to ensure that your goals are meaningful. In a nut shell, goals shouldn't hurt your life, but should make you a better person and also bring you closer to friends and family. Remember one last thing, always protect your good reputation. All the best!!!

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Protecting your relationship from the third person

When we are dating somebody , there is obvously good reason to feel that somebody else might snatch him or her away especially because that is the kind of thing we hear about so many times these days. However, we don't need to fear nomore because if you take the following tips, you might just save yourself the trouble of having to lose somebody you like or love to somebody else. Heres is some good advice for you, these things can happen anytime.

Tips to protecting your relationship

Whenever you are dating its important to understand that your date will meet alot of people with or without your presence. That is not a bad thing because lets face it, we are all social beings. Incase you didn't know, sometimes the person who is trying to snatch your date away from you could be somebody you know very well. Here are some ways to protecting yourself from a possible hijacking......SHIELDS UP!!!

1. Avoid secret dating; If you are dating secretly there are chances you will never know what is going on behind your back..WHy?? lets face it, since only a few people know about your relationship they wont be able to alert you if something went wrong or if somebody close to you was chasing after your date. Heres some good advice for you, you have to make the relationship known to family, friends and other concerned people. We are not saying you should advertise it, but just let people be aware of what is happening.

2. Confront the person; If you suspect that somebody is trying to ruin your relationship or snatch the person you care about away, tell them to keep away. You can either do it directly or indirectly. But in my opinion, the indirect method just for a start is better. What does the indirect method involve? Well, you dont necessarily have to tell the person to their face but you can simply give them a hint that you are aware about what is happening and wouldn't want it to continue. If that fails, you can tell him/her yourself by reaffirming to them that the both of you are committed. If that fails, then your date will need to be a part of preventing the whole thing all together.

3. Don't overreact; When you see your date with another person, dont overeact or storm around in anger because that would just weaken the relationship you already have. The point is, you have to come out as the better person and the way you react to such things sometimes will show whether you are the right person for them or not. Heres some good advice for you, when you see something like that....walk towards your date and ask them to come with you (calmly) or just stick around the three of you. And in your conversation, shift the topic from what they were discussing to your relationship and the wonderful time you two have been spending.

Good advice to having a happy relationship

Before you begin dating it is very important that you choose the right person. Also, there is need to be the right person to them. Ofcourse, sometimes things work out and other times it doesn't but how you react to problems will show whether you are actually ready for the commitment. Heres some good advice for you, maintaining a happy relationship involves being generous. Being generous with time and resources. All the best!!

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Resolving an argument

In a relationship

Everybody argues and that's one thing we can never really avoid, why is that the case? Well for starters each of us have our own opinion about life and about how things should really be handled. Lets look at it this way, you were brought up differently in a different environment and therefore somethings (if not most) you hear your friend say or do, you simply dont agree. Heres some good advice for you, arguments happen all the time in a relationship but you have to learn to resolve them. Here are six tips to doing so.

6 tips to resolving an argument

1. Apologizing; There is always room for an apology and in rear occasions, even if it wasn't entirely your fault you can simply say a sorry just to reduce the already existing tension between the two of you. However, that is not to say that apologizing should be changed into a habit such that it even loses its meaning. Heres some good advice for you, apologizing could make the relationship stronger.

2. Take a break; Alright your arguement has been lasting for over 10 minutes and in your head you are anticipating that it might just actually go to an hour. What do you do? Simply take a break or walk away...atleast temporarily. You see, the more you argue the more difficult it becomes to reduce the tension existing between the two of you. So before it gets out of hand, you need to really give the two of you a break and wait until both your tempers cool down before you can resume solving an argument.

3. Get a third person; There is nothing wrong with having a trusted friend or relative present to help you resolve a dispute. The idea is not to embarass anybody, however all we want to aim at doing is to have a mediator who can open our minds and help the both of you solve your problem.

4. Don't bring in past mistakes; The tempatation is very high to bring in past mistakes that has been done in the past. However heres some good advice for you, bringing back past mistakes may actually make it very difficult to solve the problem...Ofcourse not always but the point is, we want to focus on resolving the current problem.

5. Taming the tongue; Usually when people are in a heated argument, it is really so difficult to control their speech. Why? Well the truth is, both have a very high temper. One way to resolve a dispute is to think before you speak. Yes, thinking before you speak will enable you to weigh your words carefully and ensure that you dont continue offending the person you are argueing with thus making it more difficult to solve the problem.

6. Ask for a suggestion; Well there is a point in the argument where you are so tired and you want the argument to just stop, what do you do?...Just resolve it. How? Well imagine you have been arguing over the way both of you should spend your time, ask the person for a suggestion and if you agree with it then go by it. Questions like "how do you think we should spend our time?" or "What will make you happy" may show that you are actually interested in what they have to say about the matter.

Remember, you don't want an argument to prolong until the other coming days, heres some good advice for you, resolve your argument today.

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Moving on after a breakup

Why so incredibly difficult

Break-ups are never so pleasant because the truth is it can hurt anybody anytime. Thinking about all those wonderful times and moments you spent and all for nothing makes it feel worthless and just makes you want to give up all together. Although some people take a few days or months to heal, others take years or even forever depending on the magnitude. Heres some good advice for you, we are all different.

Dealing with different hearts

Some people don't take long to get over a break-up or to get over the pain caused by the break-up. Why that is the case, well these could be the following reasons;

1. Reason for the break-up; If the reason for breaking up was simply because of something such as, arguing so much or disagreements,  and the couple mutually agree that its time to call it quit, then healing may not always take so long for some. Ofcourse it all depends on circumstances.

2. Mental disposition; Others are able to heal quickly because they are quit mentally and emotionally stronger. When negative things like this happens in their life, they dont easily give in to sadness that can last them for years.

3. Period of dating; Others are able to heal quickly because the relationship didn't really last that long so in effect, they weren't really dating so long to a level where they would be deeply, deeply hurt. Ofcourse, circumstances change.

Good advice for healing especially the deep wounds

Whenever somebody goes through a heart break the first thing they feel is a really painful feeling in their chest leading to tears and then self pity. Most times a heartbreak could lead to people isolating themselves from other, failing to do things they really enjoyed before and failing to be really happy with themselves. But what good advice is there for anybody to move on?

Well its not easy but the truth is, it can work. Firstly there is need to try by all means to forgive the person who broke your heart. Although that can be extremely difficult, holding a grudge against the offender your entire life can just take your energy away and make you hate others. Secondly, you need to rekindle the kind of life you had before. Start doing things you enjoyed before...If it was jogging or playing tennis, do those things. The whole point is, you want to discover yourself and want to get back on your two feet.

Thirdly, dont quickly rush into a relationship but if you do, take the friendship one step at a time. Try to learn from your past lessons and be very observant if the person has really serious intentions you or not. Hope this advice helps, All the best!!!!

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Falling in Love with two people

Why it happens

This really happens alot and the truth is, sometimes you can't even explain why. As a rule of thumb, its either you choose one or leave the other and you can't have it both ways. However, before we even go there, Why does it happen? Alot of times we just find ourselves being caught up in really difficult situations like these and it so happens that we are just caught up out of nowhere, with not a clue what to do. For one thing it happens because we spend alot of time with alot of people who may have the qualities we might be looking for. We fall in love with these people and then things start getting ugly. Heres some good advice for you, it can happen to anyone but decisions have to be made.

Diving into details

The reasons why it happens may be plenty or may be a few but the fact is, we spend a lot of time with a lot of people and in the process we meet different people whom we think have the qualities we are looking for. But there are other reasons too;

1. Loneliness; When you get lonely sometimes even when you are dating and heading towards Marriage, there may be someone who is always available to talk to you. This person is viewed to be more like a substitute when the person you are dating isn't always around. Because you want that loneliness gap filled, you end up falling in love them.

2. Rocky relationship; When you are going through a rocky relationship, that doesn't mean it will stay that way forever. However, because you are at that phase of arguments, fights and disagreements , sometimes people tend to seek comfort from somewhere else. When they find that person they end up falling for them. But at the same time, they are still in love with the one they are actually dating.

3. Personalities; There are qualities about the one you are dating and heading towards Marriage with, that you like and dislike. When you find someone else who has the missing qualities you were looking for, you end up falling in love with them but at the same time you still love the current one.

Good or Bad?

These things all depend on circumstances at times. However, in principle there is only one Love in your life and one choice. Nobody can have it both ways and that's a fact. Here's some good advice for you, If you are going through such a situation in life you have to make a decision. There is absolutely no need to complicate things, its either you choose one or leave the other or vice versa.

Ask yourself these important questions should you allow this thing to continue

-Am I being honest to any of them if I allow this to continue?
-How will they feel if they found out the truth?
-What can I do to end this?
-Who can I talk to about this problem?

Asking yourself these questions may not conclude the matter there and then but will certainly bring you one step closer to doing the right thing. Here's some good advice for you, make the right decision today.

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Little things that can mean alot

All done out of love

Love is like pretty flowers that are ready to blossom forth. You know, making someone feel special doesn't necessarily involve doing big or large complicated things, but you will be surprised at how much even the seemingly small insignificant things could mean to someone you love whom you are Married to or intend to Marry. Heres some good advice for you, Let love blossom forth. However, what are some of these small things that really mean alot?

Things that really mean alot

1. I really care about you; Saying those words gives the person you love reassurance that they are always on your mind and you really care about them. But it isn't always what you say that matters but it is how you say it. Also, if you really want them to know you care, you have to show them you care.

2. Buy a simple gift; You will be surprised at just how much a simple gift can do to someone you are Married to or courting. Remember a gift doesn't always have to be expensive, actually in my opinion I just feel it works well if it is just simple and straightforward. What you should know about a gift is not really the value you put on it, but its the thought. So if you are buying a gift for your wife it could be a simple rose, or if its for your husband it could be a simple tie. What is important? the thought and how much time and energy you took to make the simple gift look presentable.

3. Commend them when they do the right thing; Ofcourse dont exagerate the truth but what we are saying here is to offer encourage when they do something right, especially if they worked so hard to do it. Why is that important? You answer that.

4. Do simple favors; Are there things you can think of that you think can make your dear one happy if you did it in form of a favor?..Well here's some good advice for you why not do it. Sometimes we tend to overlook how much an extra hand can mean to the other person if we just jump in to help our dearest friend. There are simple things you can do, and ofcourse you know what those things are. If you are Married and your wife usually does the dishes, you can help out on a certain day to do them instead. But then there are other favors out there which can lighten the load. The point is to be observant.

What you need to know

Relationships are all about being generous with your time, your resources and even your warmth and love. There are many simple things you can think of in this life that can make each of you happy. However, always remember to do it willingly and from the heart because that is what really matters. Lets do it folks.

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How to tell someone is unhappy

You really should see the warning signs

There is really not a doubt that sometimes a relationship may seem so perfect and so secure. But the truth is, sometimes what you see on the outside isn't really how a couple are really feeling. Yes those smiles and hugs may not actually be what is in the inside because sometimes people in a relationship are secretly sad. But how do you tell whether the person you are dating isn't really happy but are secretly suffering inside. Heres some good advice for you, it isn't very easy.

Signs he/she isn't really happy

Its not really easy to tell that somebody isn't really happy because there is nobody in this entire world who can read hearts. However, there are some warning signs you wont want to ignore.

1. If they say so; If in your conversations as a couple, somebody is always mentioning how unhappy they are to you or to other most trusted people you know, that could be a warning sign. The biggest mistake you can make is simply ignoring it.

2. Their Atitude; If somebody is always moody and negative when he/she is with the person their dating, but doesn't behave the same way with other people then that could be a warning sign. I mean think of it, they are supposed to be happy with you and not vice-versa. Ofcourse circumstances do differ from situation to situation, but that can probably be a warning sign you shouldn't ignore.

3. The way they see other relationship; Many people who are unhappy with their relationship are usually happy with other relationship they see either on T.V or in their own circles. So, if for some reasons you are always hearing him/her say good about other relationships and rarely commends your own, then that could be a warning sign.

Good advice to making it work

When you get to confirm that the person you have a relationship with isn't really happy, then you have to find a way to make them happy. There are many ways to do that, but all in all its begins with talking it out and letting it out. In your discussion be honest and open and then find a lasting solution.

Take for example, if the problem is that you don't have time for the relationship then what is the solution? You have to find time to be together. If you are dating this advice applies to you, however if you are married this advice applies to you even more because there is nothing more important than to see your family remain happy, especially your spouse. Heres some good advice for you, dont mess things up.

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5 relationship problems couples face

You might be one of them

Every relationship has its own problems no matter how much you try to avoid it, its just a sad reality. However, these days couples tend allow their problems to prolong over extended periods of time evidently resulting in a breakup. To solve a problem you really have to understand a problem, heres some good advice for you....Here are 5 common relationship problems couples these days almost always face.

5 common relationship problems faced today

1. Cheating; These days there is alot of cheating going around and the truth is, it really stinks. However, that's besides the point, its a common problem many couples are facing all over the globe resulting into relationships breaking up. Heres some good advice for you, remain loyal and see the relationship flowrish.

2. Communication; Many relationships today actually do communicate, however the problem is many misunderstand each other resulting into arguments and differences. It is these arguments that result into further arguments which evidently leads to breakups. When communicating as a couple, there is always need to really get to understand what your friend is really saying. That involves really trying to understand the meaning behind the words spoken and really trying to find a solution.

3. Trust; Some relationships have a big problem of trust. Ofcourse the world we live in is so full of so many negative things that in the end, you as a couple get caught in the middle. Trust however is an important ingredient in any relationship and building that trust is a must.

4. Holding things in; When somebody in the relationship is offended by the person he/she is dating and never lets it out to discuss the problem, that can really be a threat to two people maintaining a happy relationship in future. Mounting offenses done to you over a period of time can really create a heavy load and when you finally let it out, it can turn into something explosive. Here's some good advice for you, to avoid this problem, you have to discuss it. That's that.

5. Money; Money and fame can sometimes become a really huge problem between two people. How does it really become a problem? Well since we live in a materialistic world, there is no doubt that sometimes what we see on T.V or see our friends having can really appeal to couples and make them want to have all those nice things. However, if those things cannot be got because of circumstances such as poor salary or being generally broke, then that can make a couple disappointed resulting into further problems. Ofcourse, money is important but the degree its placed by some couples really makes it difficult for people to really get close together. Its really important for people to put money in its proper place and thus make their relationship work.

Good advice for overcoming any problem

You may be facing a problem as a couple or may be facing a personal problem. Problems will always affect us nomatter what we do or say. However, here is some good advice for you...We need to grab the bull by their horns. We need to take control of the situation and don't let a problem take control of you. You can do it...Lets do it.

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Saying your goodbyes

A friendship you thought would last forever

Having a best friend you can play, share and enjoy wonderful moments with is really a rare scenario these days. Every human being needs a trustworthy companion whom they can share secrets with and solve problems. Ofcourse, it can be really hard to see a best friend suddenly leave to another city, or town or country. That's really what happens to many people today and none of those situations have been really pleasant because saying goodbyes is like saying goodbye to a wonderful friendship. Heres some good advice for you, you are not alone.

Why friends leave

Friends leave due to a number of reasons some of them include job prospects, better life elsewhere, marriage or even catastrophe. Ofcourse, non of these things is usually anyone's fault but its just that life is always in transition. We are always on the move exploring new things, and looking for better ways to live our short lived lives.

When a friend decides to leave, the first thing that comes into our minds is why? But even as that why question is answered, we usually don't want our close friends to leave us for whatever reason. We usually wan't them to stay because just the thought of them leaving hurts us inside. Saying a goodbye is never easy considering the many joyful times you spent together and the many times you pulled through problems together, its never easy to say goodbye. But thats just how it is, sometimes you just have to accept the situation.

Even when friends leave, you dont have to feel too low. We live in a global village and no matter how far somebody travels, you can still keep intouch through phone, email or letter. What really matters is communication.

How to say Goodbye

When saying goodbye to your best friend, don't make the atmosphere feel so sad and low like you will never see each other again. Ofcourse you can exchange a few tears, but really your friendship will not die simply because of moving to different places, but will always be there as it should be.

Just say your goodbyes and get it over with. Exchange your new contact details and addresses and always try to keep in touch. When the right time comes, arrange to travel on a visit and catch up on old times with the limited time you have to spend. Also, learn to make new friends and also accept the new friends made by your best friend with open arms.

Heres some good advice for you, say your goodbye in a happy cheerful way and look forward to meeting each other again. All the best!!

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People you should always avoid

Your associates do matter

I am sure you have heard of the saying that goes, birds of the same feather flock together. Well that is exactly what is true and why its important by all costs to choose your associates wisely. Not just anybody matters but the truth is, whoever you choose to be around with should be able to build you and help you move forward in life. Heres some good advice for you, make the right choice today. Here are some people you should just not hang around with.

Associates you should avoid

1. People who are negative; Ofcourse life isn't really as colourful as we would like it to be but the truth is, we don't always like to hear bad news. Bad news all the time and feeling low really can put your emotions down resulting in reacting to challenges in a really poor way. Heres some good advice for you, you want to avoid people who are always negative about everything.

2. People who have poor values; These are the kind of people who think always doing things their own way whether its right or wrong is okay. Its always important to realize that in this world, we need to have values and not just have "I don't care what people think about me" attitude even when it is clearly wrong what we are doing. Lets face reality, if you continue to hang around such people, you may get into serious trouble.

3. People who think they are better than others; There are some people who are so full of themselves that they look down on everyone around them. Ofcourse for a while you may not be their target. but once they target you then will you realize how much low esteem can creep into you. Piece of advice, stay away from them.

4. People who use you for selfish reasons; I bet you have heard about friends with benefits. Except in this case, it is just one sided. Now if you haven't seen it yet that you are being used, its better you wake up to reality because once your role is over, you will just be thrown away like trash.

5. People who are embarrassed to be around you; If you are a person who is reasonably well behaved and seen by others as generally okay, then why should some other person be embarrassed about you. When you are around such associates they can really make you feel low and you can get that feeling that nobody likes you. Heres some good advice for you, don't stick around people who feel you are an embarrassment to them but stick to people who really care.

Good advice for you

The basic thing here is whenever you associate with people as friends, these should be people who will build you in a positive way and not bring you down. Choose the right friends today.

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Resolving a dispute

Differences are always ugly

We all have differences, whether its with a friend or our date or our relatives, differences always happen. The thing is, we all think differently and we all act differently and all come from different backgrounds. However, differences are not always taken lightly, infact they can get really personal....That's right, most of the time they become ugly. But just what is the problem? well heres some good advice for you folks we can resolve any difference we may face with anybody. Lets just look at how we can do that shall we.

Steps to resolving disputes

Disputes between neighbors or friends are always unavoidable. We live in a world where these things happen and they can be big disputes or small disputes. But whatever type they are we have to take the necessary steps to resolve them or they can get really, really ugly.

Step 1.Get to the route of the problem; Most times differences arise because of a difference in opinion or understanding. One of you feels he has the right answer while the other feels that they have the righter answer to a certain problem...Before you know it an argument errupts. However, sometimes it may not just be a difference in opinion that has caused the indifference but could also be the mood of someone that day, a situation any of you are going through or even just a personal feeling. So what is key here is really getting to understand your friend and seeing whether they may need help in the other areas of life they may going through. If somebody said something bad to you, did they really mean it? or was it a mistake on their part?

Step 2.Taking the first initiative; Most times when there is a difference we usually like to blame the other person for causing it. Ofcourse, it may be true that they caused it but usually these days, nobody wants to take the blame for anything. If you really want to resolve this difference, one of you has to take the first step in restoring the friendship you had. Heres some good advice for you, why not that be you.

Step 3. Forget about it and move on; Yes it would help if we just try to bring things back to normal by simply trying our level best of forgetting about it and restoring a friendship. Not easy but would surely help if we tried.

Disputes in a relationship

Differences that arise between people that are Married or are heading towards that can be really hard to solve at times. However, the principle still applies, we want to restore the closness and love that existed before. Now, if there is that possibility that the relationship could be given a second chance, why not take that chance. Ofcourse, circumstances are different but the last thing we want is to be enemies forever.

Here's some good advice for you, you can actually make it work. All the best!!

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